Growing Up Religious with Caleb Barge - Episode 373

[00:00:00] Alright everybody, welcome to the show. I got a good friend, comedian Caleb Barge. Welcome to the show man, how you doing?

[00:00:07] Good, I'm doing well. Hal, how are you?

[00:00:09] I'm doing pretty well man. Alright, so we actually, we were talking about like where, about where we met. We met like two or three months ago at the Lake Mike, right?

[00:00:20] Yes, Lakeside Mike. 1311 South.

[00:00:25] If you're ever interested in going.

[00:00:27] It's in Riverside.

[00:00:28] Which is a very nice area.

[00:00:31] Yeah, it is.

[00:00:32] It is. That's like very close to like downtown too.

[00:00:35] Yes.

[00:00:36] It's a nice part of the downtown area.

[00:00:39] Yeah, because Riverside is very nice and it's kind of expensive because that's what I first looked at when I moved here.

[00:00:43] Yeah.

[00:00:44] And then East Riverside, it gets kind of shitty.

[00:00:46] Yeah.

[00:00:46] That's where all the junkies are and shit.

[00:00:48] Yeah, downtown is a tricky place. It can be really nice or it can be very ugly.

[00:00:54] Well, if you go to 6th Street, it's shit.

[00:00:56] Yes, yes, yes. Yeah, I hate it.

[00:00:59] But how long have you been here in Austin?

[00:01:02] In December, December 4th, it'll be a year.

[00:01:05] December 4th. Okay. Yeah, that's coming up.

[00:01:07] Yeah.

[00:01:07] Yeah.

[00:01:08] Oh man, I can't believe that I only met you like a few months ago.

[00:01:13] Yeah, it was during the summer.

[00:01:14] Yeah.

[00:01:15] Definitely during the summer because it was very hot.

[00:01:17] But dude, Lakeside Mike, I had some really good times there even though it was hot.

[00:01:23] I think everybody was like, let's try to make the best of this.

[00:01:25] Yeah.

[00:01:25] Also, Seth, that guy who runs it has a very good attitude.

[00:01:28] Yeah, he's a nice guy.

[00:01:29] Yeah.

[00:01:29] I like him.

[00:01:29] He brings like, he makes it fun.

[00:01:31] He also brings free beer and free seltzer.

[00:01:33] Yeah.

[00:01:33] I keep telling him not to do that.

[00:01:35] Yeah.

[00:01:36] Even though I'm like, dude, this is great.

[00:01:37] Stop doing that.

[00:01:38] You're like wasting money.

[00:01:39] I think, but I think it works though.

[00:01:41] Yeah.

[00:01:41] I mean, people go there specifically for that.

[00:01:44] Yeah.

[00:01:45] The people that are, I mean, it doesn't get too many people.

[00:01:48] Yeah.

[00:01:48] But the people that go there really appreciate it.

[00:01:50] Yeah.

[00:01:51] I mean, I drink a seltzer every single time.

[00:01:52] Yeah, me too.

[00:01:54] I've drank a couple seltzers, so.

[00:01:56] Yeah, yeah.

[00:01:57] Thank you, Seth.

[00:01:58] Yeah.

[00:01:59] So, where did you grow up, man?

[00:02:02] I grew up, I was born in New Jersey.

[00:02:06] Mm-hmm.

[00:02:07] My parents met in New York City.

[00:02:10] Uh, cause they met, they were in a Christian cult.

[00:02:14] Okay.

[00:02:15] Yeah.

[00:02:15] Did I tell you about this?

[00:02:16] No, no, you did not.

[00:02:18] Yeah.

[00:02:19] Um, my mom joined the cult in Ohio, I believe, and my dad joined in Pennsylvania.

[00:02:24] And then they had like a main headquarters in New York City, cause there's a lot of people

[00:02:27] to convert there.

[00:02:28] Okay.

[00:02:29] Yeah.

[00:02:29] And, uh, they met in New York and the cult is called, I'm not kidding, the Forever Family.

[00:02:35] Ha ha ha.

[00:02:36] Well, it's recently changed their name to the Church of Understanding.

[00:02:40] You can find them on Wikipedia.

[00:02:41] Cause they had a bad press, I'm guessing?

[00:02:42] I don't know, but you can find them on Wikipedia.

[00:02:45] But also, if you do look it up on Wikipedia, there is a Seinfeld episode.

[00:02:49] About it?

[00:02:49] Yeah.

[00:02:50] Really?

[00:02:50] Based on the cult, yeah.

[00:02:51] Cause what they would do, and this is what my dad did, my dad, when I was growing up,

[00:02:57] he installed carpets for a living.

[00:02:59] Yeah.

[00:02:59] Like, uh, I could probably install a carpet in your house.

[00:03:04] Not great, but probably from memory.

[00:03:07] Just from what you saw here.

[00:03:08] Yeah.

[00:03:08] Like, I don't, I have such a useless skill in my opinion now.

[00:03:12] Everybody likes hardwood floors.

[00:03:13] I mean, especially in New York City.

[00:03:15] Um, it's a very big hardwood floor place.

[00:03:17] Yeah.

[00:03:17] But I prefer hardwood floors.

[00:03:18] Carpets are a pain in the ass.

[00:03:20] Well, yeah, I, I, I personally love carpet.

[00:03:23] I love carpet.

[00:03:24] I, I don't know why.

[00:03:25] I just like them.

[00:03:26] It feels more homey, I think.

[00:03:28] But, yeah.

[00:03:29] Cleaning them is a pain in the butt.

[00:03:30] It sucks.

[00:03:31] So, yeah.

[00:03:32] So, my dad, how they would, how they would, um, the way they made their money was the

[00:03:39] cult had a carpet cleaning business.

[00:03:42] You know, and like, they're in the 70s.

[00:03:44] Yeah.

[00:03:44] Everybody had carpets, shack, carpets.

[00:03:46] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:03:46] People had carpets in their goddamn fucking cars and shit.

[00:03:48] Yeah.

[00:03:49] So, he, uh, they would, what they would do is they would get in your house and then

[00:03:53] they'd try to convert you to the cult.

[00:03:55] And then the whole Seinfeld episode was just basically, George was so annoying, even the

[00:04:00] cult didn't want him to join.

[00:04:01] I remember this episode, yeah.

[00:04:03] That was about the cult my parents were in.

[00:04:07] That's crazy, man.

[00:04:08] Yeah, yeah.

[00:04:09] So, they changed their name.

[00:04:11] Yeah, I don't know.

[00:04:11] They're still around, though.

[00:04:13] Yeah.

[00:04:13] I mean, the guy, back when they were the Forever family, uh, the guy, I looked him up.

[00:04:19] He, he, I was scared.

[00:04:21] I, I remember texting my mom, cause I didn't know about this, um, until probably 10 years

[00:04:28] ago.

[00:04:29] Um, I didn't know my whole life.

[00:04:31] And then I found, my dad just sprung it on me one day.

[00:04:33] I was like, what?

[00:04:35] I was like, you were in a fucking cult?

[00:04:36] And he was like, yeah, all the, the, the friends that came over when you were a kid,

[00:04:40] they were all ex-members of the cult.

[00:04:42] Oh, wow.

[00:04:42] Cause a lot of people left and the cult was like, fuck you and the exiled people.

[00:04:45] Yeah.

[00:04:46] But they still, all the exiled people were friends.

[00:04:49] Yeah.

[00:04:50] Everyone.

[00:04:50] My parents were friends with us from the cult.

[00:04:52] Yeah.

[00:04:52] No fucking idea.

[00:04:54] So, uh, basically, um, what the fuck was I talking about?

[00:04:59] I was smoking a lot of pot recently.

[00:05:00] The cult.

[00:05:01] Yeah, but what was I talking about?

[00:05:02] Uh, your dad, uh, your dad sprung it up on you like really late in life.

[00:05:07] And he's like, oh yeah, all your, all these people that came to the house, they were all

[00:05:11] in the cult.

[00:05:11] Oh, what was I going to say?

[00:05:13] Oh, um, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:05:15] Sorry.

[00:05:16] I went to my mom one day after I found out, I was like, yo, I'm not a fucking cult baby,

[00:05:21] right?

[00:05:21] You didn't fuck the dude, the lead dude.

[00:05:24] And then she was like, no, I, you're, your father's kid.

[00:05:28] I was like, are you fucking sure?

[00:05:29] Yeah.

[00:05:29] And she's like, yes.

[00:05:31] And then she showed me a picture of my dad when I was, when he was young and her when

[00:05:36] she was young.

[00:05:37] We look, it's, it's, it's insane how much I look like both of them combined.

[00:05:40] Yeah.

[00:05:40] So I was like, but like, I was like, that's what cult leaders do.

[00:05:43] But the thing is, so I looked him up.

[00:05:45] He wasn't, he didn't really do that shit, but he was like super abusive to his girl,

[00:05:49] anyone he was dating in the cult.

[00:05:50] Really?

[00:05:51] Yeah.

[00:05:51] Like he used to hit her and hit the girls and stuff like that.

[00:05:54] So, um, yeah, I mean, what are the chances of a cult leader being a piece of shit?

[00:05:59] Pretty high.

[00:06:01] That's typically how it goes.

[00:06:03] They either are a piece of shit or they want to fuck everybody that's in the, in the cult.

[00:06:07] Yeah.

[00:06:07] And I, I find cults fascinating.

[00:06:10] I mean, there's like a, there was a guy in the seventies who was just literally dosing

[00:06:15] every one of his cult members with acid constantly.

[00:06:18] And he was having sex with the dudes cause he was gay.

[00:06:21] Oh, is that, is that the guy from Austin?

[00:06:24] I don't know.

[00:06:25] I don't know if it's from Austin, but I'm, he's a, he was a big one.

[00:06:28] He was a popular one.

[00:06:29] So he was having sex with the men.

[00:06:32] I've heard, get them all fucked up on acid and shit.

[00:06:34] So I've heard this story on the Rogan podcast.

[00:06:36] He, when he was buying the comedy club, the first building that he had was that owned by

[00:06:42] that cult.

[00:06:43] Really?

[00:06:43] That you're talking about.

[00:06:44] Yeah.

[00:06:44] Interesting.

[00:06:45] And the guy just moved here.

[00:06:46] I don't know where he originally started, but he moved here to get away.

[00:06:50] Cause it was back in the day where, you know, there was no internet.

[00:06:53] So you can like just go away and people, Oh, you don't exist anymore.

[00:06:57] Yep.

[00:06:58] So, so lovely.

[00:06:58] Exactly.

[00:06:59] So he had bought that building and then they're like, uh, well this, and everybody's like,

[00:07:05] Oh, maybe you should drop out of this.

[00:07:07] And that's what he did.

[00:07:08] So that's why it's on sixth street now.

[00:07:10] Where was the original one?

[00:07:11] You know, I don't know where that is.

[00:07:13] No.

[00:07:14] Interesting.

[00:07:14] I mean, I mean like, look, look, look, the Waco thing, they were a cult, right?

[00:07:20] Yeah.

[00:07:21] But by, they did not deserve what they got from what I like heard about them.

[00:07:28] Like, they were just like, they were just like, it seemed like I've only seen the, have

[00:07:34] you seen the show?

[00:07:36] Yeah.

[00:07:36] Yes.

[00:07:37] It was like the mini series?

[00:07:38] Yeah.

[00:07:38] I've only seen the show, but it made them seem like they were nice people and they just,

[00:07:43] the police just didn't like the fact that there was someone.

[00:07:47] And that's the thing.

[00:07:48] Cause Bill Hicks was very, I don't know if you're a Bill Hicks fan, but like, yeah, he's

[00:07:52] great.

[00:07:53] But he was very like, look, the government's kind of being fucked up here.

[00:07:56] And they were very, they, they did like fucking psychological warfare on them.

[00:07:59] You know, um, basically they were kind of like the, you know, in Texas where they were

[00:08:05] kind of like, we want to secede from society and kind of be, which is weird cause Texas

[00:08:10] always wants to secede.

[00:08:11] Yeah.

[00:08:12] But the thing is, it wasn't really Texas.

[00:08:14] It was the fucking federal government.

[00:08:16] And, uh, it was ATF.

[00:08:18] And I think what happened with, cause in the show they said they got a bad rap cause they

[00:08:21] murdered some dude.

[00:08:22] And then they were like, we need to like fix that.

[00:08:25] You know, the ATF is really not necessary.

[00:08:27] Yeah.

[00:08:28] It's, it's a complicated branch of law.

[00:08:31] It really is.

[00:08:31] It's really not necessary.

[00:08:32] So I think that's what they're, they know they're not fucking shit.

[00:08:35] So, you know, so they probably had to make up for it.

[00:08:38] But apparently like, I mean, yeah, there was some stuff about like the guy had a white

[00:08:44] who was really, really young, like probably not good.

[00:08:47] Yeah.

[00:08:48] You know, but the crimes they got accused of was, you know, gun stuff.

[00:08:52] Yeah.

[00:08:53] But in Texas it would have been like a fucking slap on the wrist.

[00:08:55] Cause you have like, everybody has a gun here apparently.

[00:09:00] Yeah.

[00:09:00] Everybody has a gun.

[00:09:01] Yeah.

[00:09:02] Yeah.

[00:09:02] Yeah.

[00:09:03] So it's, it's fucked up.

[00:09:05] But yeah.

[00:09:05] Culture.

[00:09:06] Interesting.

[00:09:07] Interesting things, man.

[00:09:08] So that's, that's crazy.

[00:09:10] So, and how old were you when, when they told you this?

[00:09:12] I was in New York city.

[00:09:14] I remember that.

[00:09:15] I was probably 29.

[00:09:19] Oh wow.

[00:09:19] That's not even 10 years ago.

[00:09:21] I'm about to be 39.

[00:09:23] Okay.

[00:09:23] So almost 10 years ago.

[00:09:25] Yeah.

[00:09:25] Yeah.

[00:09:25] Yeah.

[00:09:25] Yeah.

[00:09:25] So yeah, I think literally 10 years ago.

[00:09:28] Oh damn dude.

[00:09:29] So you were born in Jersey.

[00:09:31] They moved to New York, New York city.

[00:09:33] And then they got pregnant with me and left the cult.

[00:09:37] Okay.

[00:09:38] I'm from my understanding.

[00:09:39] And then they drove up to upstate New York, not even that far upstate, like only an hour

[00:09:43] and a half and they bought property.

[00:09:46] And, uh, my mom side was rich.

[00:09:50] Okay.

[00:09:51] Yeah.

[00:09:51] My mom's dad was like a millionaire.

[00:09:54] Okay.

[00:09:54] Oil guy.

[00:09:55] Oil type.

[00:09:56] Yeah.

[00:09:56] In Cleveland.

[00:09:58] Okay.

[00:09:58] She would, so she had money.

[00:10:01] Um, and then they, you know, he, my dad was poor as fuck.

[00:10:06] Mm-hmm.

[00:10:07] Like, you know, my dad was like horribly abused as a kid.

[00:10:12] Really?

[00:10:13] Horribly abused.

[00:10:13] Yeah.

[00:10:14] The stories he tells me, I don't talk to him anymore, but like the stories he told me was

[00:10:18] insane.

[00:10:19] Yeah.

[00:10:19] Like his, well I even note it, like his grandfather, uh, my grandfather.

[00:10:24] Um.

[00:10:25] His dad.

[00:10:26] Yeah.

[00:10:26] Yeah.

[00:10:26] Well the story goes because I, one day I smoked DMT and then I got all like happy for a while

[00:10:31] and they were like, you gotta like, so I went to my dad, I was like, what's, what happened?

[00:10:36] Cause my dad was fucked up.

[00:10:37] So, so I was trying to forgive my dad for a long time and then he fucked it up again.

[00:10:41] So I just gave up.

[00:10:42] But basically when I was trying to see where he was coming from, he told me that basically

[00:10:47] his dad, um, was abused by his dad.

[00:10:51] So my great grandfather was actually, no, his, my great grandfather was murdered in a card game.

[00:10:59] Um, and then by the mob or something, something like, I mean, I don't think it was mob shit,

[00:11:05] but it was like, it was old school or something.

[00:11:07] Yeah.

[00:11:07] Someone where he got accused of cheating.

[00:11:09] He didn't really came back with a gun.

[00:11:11] Someone fucking shot him.

[00:11:12] So my great grandmother married a guy because women weren't allowed to fucking work back then.

[00:11:17] And she had a shit ton of kids.

[00:11:18] She had like fucking eight.

[00:11:18] Oh wow.

[00:11:19] And then, um, so she married a bad guy.

[00:11:22] And his dad is the one who was mean to your dad?

[00:11:25] Yes.

[00:11:25] He tried to kill my grandfather with a knife and then he also raped all his sisters.

[00:11:30] Jesus Christ, dude.

[00:11:31] Yeah.

[00:11:32] Yeah.

[00:11:33] So I don't know.

[00:11:33] No, no.

[00:11:34] This is riveting.

[00:11:35] I don't know.

[00:11:36] It's, it's, it's a little, it's after 12.

[00:11:37] Yeah.

[00:11:38] Yeah.

[00:11:38] It's, it's, it's late enough.

[00:11:40] Yeah.

[00:11:40] Yeah.

[00:11:40] Yeah.

[00:11:40] Yeah.

[00:11:41] Yeah.

[00:11:41] Yeah.

[00:11:41] Yeah.

[00:11:41] Yeah.

[00:11:42] My dad got passed along down and my grandfather was just, he just took it out on every, all

[00:11:47] my dad said like, dude, I used to have to sit next to him growing up as a kid.

[00:11:51] I think he really punched him in the face and stuff like that.

[00:11:53] We're eating food and stuff.

[00:11:54] He was very, he's a piece of shit.

[00:11:55] For no apparent reason.

[00:11:57] And like he would, um, we'd be downstairs playing in their basement as a kid cause we'd

[00:12:01] go to visit and he would come down and start yelling at us and he wanted to hit us.

[00:12:05] And my mom was like, you're not touching my fucking kid.

[00:12:07] He wanted to hit, beat us.

[00:12:08] And it's like, what's your fucking deal, dude?

[00:12:11] Yeah.

[00:12:11] Yeah.

[00:12:11] Weird.

[00:12:12] So that got passed on to my dad.

[00:12:14] My dad never really fixed himself.

[00:12:16] Yeah.

[00:12:16] He's better.

[00:12:16] He was better than my dad was better than his, your grandpa.

[00:12:19] Yeah.

[00:12:19] But still not like that.

[00:12:20] Did you ever meet your grandpa?

[00:12:21] Yeah.

[00:12:21] Yeah.

[00:12:22] Yeah.

[00:12:22] Yeah.

[00:12:22] He's dead.

[00:12:22] I didn't go to his funeral.

[00:12:23] I'm thinking.

[00:12:24] So he was a dick to you too?

[00:12:26] He was, it was weird because he loved, no, he loved babies.

[00:12:29] He loved when they were young.

[00:12:31] And then as soon as you got to like a kid age, he'd start screaming.

[00:12:34] Like literally do.

[00:12:35] Like I, I think I developed fucking anxiety from being there.

[00:12:38] Like literally just caught.

[00:12:41] Like my grandma would be stirring the sauce.

[00:12:42] It's classic Italian shit.

[00:12:44] Yeah.

[00:12:44] I always say like, I love Italian food.

[00:12:45] I don't like all the yelling and the screaming.

[00:12:47] Yeah.

[00:12:47] Stirring the sauce.

[00:12:48] And then she'd, and she'd be smoking, chain smoking cigarettes while she's smoking the

[00:12:52] sauce.

[00:12:52] I mean, stirring the sauce.

[00:12:53] Then she'd stop to like say something.

[00:12:55] He'd be like, keep stirring the sauce.

[00:12:56] Like the classic shit.

[00:12:58] And he, she's like, I'm fucking stirring.

[00:13:00] He's just like, you fucking love the screaming constantly.

[00:13:03] And I just be like a little kid, like what the fuck is going on, man?

[00:13:06] Yeah.

[00:13:06] You know?

[00:13:07] And I remember high anxiety everywhere.

[00:13:10] And I remember I was sitting at a table and my grandmother just like, he leaves the room,

[00:13:15] my grandfather.

[00:13:15] My grandmother just turns and looks at me and she goes, Caleb, you're not eating enough.

[00:13:18] And I was like, what are you talking about?

[00:13:20] And she starts dipping bread in oil and vinegar and shoving it down my throat where I almost

[00:13:25] choked.

[00:13:26] Whoa.

[00:13:27] Just feed it, force feeding me.

[00:13:28] Was it because your grandpa was going to beat you up for not eating?

[00:13:33] I don't know.

[00:13:33] So I just remember being like, you know, and my, my dad being like not doing anything.

[00:13:38] He was just being like, mom, he needs to chew, you know?

[00:13:41] Yeah.

[00:13:42] He wouldn't do anything, you know?

[00:13:43] Yeah.

[00:13:44] It was crazy.

[00:13:44] It was just like, I, and I remember being like, I don't like going there.

[00:13:48] Damn.

[00:13:48] And then I eventually, we stopped going.

[00:13:51] Yeah.

[00:13:51] Because I was just like, I don't fucking go there.

[00:13:53] Yeah.

[00:13:53] Fucking horrible.

[00:13:54] Weird situation.

[00:13:54] What am I getting, what the, is the food is that good?

[00:13:56] No.

[00:13:57] No.

[00:13:57] It was very good though.

[00:13:58] Oh yeah.

[00:13:58] She was.

[00:13:59] Have you ever had any Italian that came close to it?

[00:14:01] Yeah, of course.

[00:14:02] It's not hard to cook that shit.

[00:14:03] It's, it's pretty easy.

[00:14:04] But like, I, I almost contacted my grandma to get her recipes because I was going to fucking

[00:14:11] take that shit and make money off.

[00:14:12] It was good.

[00:14:13] You wanted to be like a chef and shit?

[00:14:15] I thought I was going to, I wanted to have a food truck for a while, but the thing is

[00:14:19] I didn't want to make Italian food.

[00:14:20] Okay.

[00:14:20] But I almost did that.

[00:14:22] Um, well, this other comic in New York City was like, dude, we should just get a food

[00:14:26] truck and fucking drive around and tour and then do that in the morning and then just stand

[00:14:30] up at night.

[00:14:31] Yeah.

[00:14:31] And I was like, yeah, that sounds awesome.

[00:14:33] But like, I ain't doing it because I hated fucking working in food.

[00:14:37] Okay.

[00:14:38] I just wanted to get out and I eventually, it took me 10 years to finally change my career

[00:14:42] into what I'm doing now, which is tech and cybersecurity shit.

[00:14:45] Okay.

[00:14:46] So damn dude.

[00:14:49] So this, what, what part of New York was this?

[00:14:54] Brooklyn.

[00:14:55] Brooklyn.

[00:14:57] Brooklyn.

[00:14:57] Brooklyn.

[00:14:57] So I've never been to Brooklyn.

[00:14:59] Is that considered Long Island or is it just a subboro?

[00:15:02] No.

[00:15:02] Queens would be considered part of Long Island.

[00:15:04] Okay.

[00:15:05] Long Island, part of Queens.

[00:15:07] Yeah.

[00:15:07] Because if you take, if you drive out, if you're in Queens, you drive all the way far

[00:15:10] out, you'll end up in Long Island.

[00:15:11] Okay.

[00:15:12] Uh, Brooklyn is, I think, yeah, you have to go into Queens to get to Long Island.

[00:15:18] Okay.

[00:15:18] Brooklyn kind of stops.

[00:15:20] Okay.

[00:15:20] But, um, Brooklyn, I like Brooklyn a lot.

[00:15:24] Yeah.

[00:15:24] Um, I mean, it's changed a lot.

[00:15:26] I've heard stories that it's like changed like drastically.

[00:15:29] Drastically.

[00:15:30] Yeah.

[00:15:30] Yeah.

[00:15:31] I mean, it's a really nice fucking area.

[00:15:32] I mean, cause every Manhattan's too expensive.

[00:15:36] Yeah.

[00:15:36] And then everybody started moving to Brooklyn.

[00:15:38] Yeah.

[00:15:38] Brooklyn got too expensive.

[00:15:39] People started moving back into Manhattan.

[00:15:41] It's just nobody, nobody, it's like everybody lives in Brooklyn, Manhattan or Queens, like

[00:15:47] right close to it.

[00:15:48] Yeah.

[00:15:48] And then nobody likes the Bronx.

[00:15:50] Nobody lives there.

[00:15:51] Well, the Bronx is one of those places where you gotta go.

[00:15:55] Uh, no, that's Staten Island.

[00:15:57] I'm sorry.

[00:15:57] Yeah.

[00:15:57] But the Bronx is like, like the rough part of New York, I guess.

[00:16:00] It's nobody.

[00:16:01] Yeah.

[00:16:02] It's still, it's still cheap.

[00:16:03] Um, I mean, it's probably expensive as fuck, but like it's still the cheapest.

[00:16:07] In comparison.

[00:16:08] Yeah.

[00:16:08] It's crime's bad there.

[00:16:09] Um, nobody wants, nobody goes to the Bronx.

[00:16:12] Yeah.

[00:16:12] I think I've only been in Manhattan.

[00:16:15] Like that's the only part I've been in.

[00:16:16] I've, I'm curious about Long Island for some reason.

[00:16:20] Yeah.

[00:16:20] I don't know why.

[00:16:20] Long Island.

[00:16:21] I mean, you're not missing anything.

[00:16:23] Staten Island is not missing anything either.

[00:16:26] Um, Brooklyn is probably my favorite place to go hang out and chill.

[00:16:29] Manhattan.

[00:16:30] Well, I used to do standup in New York for 10 years.

[00:16:33] So literally like I would just be in Brooklyn and I would just go into Manhattan.

[00:16:38] Um, and just like if I was done with work, I'd just go into Manhattan every day and

[00:16:43] I wouldn't get home until like two o'clock in the morning every fucking night for like

[00:16:47] 10 years.

[00:16:48] What time was your shift starting at?

[00:16:50] I used to work at night as a, as a, as a cook.

[00:16:54] And then they liked me so much.

[00:16:56] I kind of went to them.

[00:16:57] I was like, look, dude, I'm going to have to quit unless you give me day shifts.

[00:16:59] Yeah.

[00:17:00] And it pissed off the chef because that was like his thing and he didn't really, we,

[00:17:04] we worked it out there basically that was like, look, you don't have to do anything.

[00:17:08] And he was like, okay.

[00:17:09] So I would just come in and prep in the morning and, um, cook for maybe like a little bit,

[00:17:14] a few hours.

[00:17:15] And I would be done by like when the restaurant opened like five o'clock or something like

[00:17:19] that.

[00:17:20] So I was able to go out and do standup cause I told him I'm like, I'm going to quit if

[00:17:24] I don't, I can't do standup.

[00:17:25] Yeah.

[00:17:25] So yeah, I basically just would go and I would just literally wake up in the morning,

[00:17:32] get to my shift at like 10 o'clock in the morning, go to work till like five or six or

[00:17:37] seven, get up, go leave and go do standup until like fucking two in the morning.

[00:17:42] Did that every night.

[00:17:44] And if it was my day off, I would get up, take a shower, eat breakfast, go do standup

[00:17:50] cause there was early mics in New York City.

[00:17:52] Yeah.

[00:17:52] Like the earliest one ever was like 12 o'clock.

[00:17:55] Okay.

[00:17:56] We would just go.

[00:17:56] I had like that.

[00:17:57] Yeah.

[00:17:57] It was, it was for, it's for restaurant people.

[00:17:59] Yeah.

[00:18:00] It literally just start all and go to like fucking.

[00:18:03] And by the time I was at my final like show or mic at the night, I was fucking drunk.

[00:18:08] Oh, okay.

[00:18:09] Cause it was my day off.

[00:18:11] But also I was, I was, I would kill cause I'd be like, I'm not rusty in the slightest.

[00:18:15] Yeah.

[00:18:16] Cause I was just like, mic, mic, mic, mic.

[00:18:19] Six is the most I ever hit, I think in one night.

[00:18:21] Okay.

[00:18:21] I think four is the most I've ever done.

[00:18:24] Six is like pretty good.

[00:18:26] I mean, I probably, who knows?

[00:18:27] I might've done more, but I'm pretty sure six is the most I've ever done.

[00:18:29] I mean, that's a lot.

[00:18:30] Yeah.

[00:18:31] It's well like, yeah, like I said, by the time you get to your fucking show, you're so loose

[00:18:36] and you don't give a fuck.

[00:18:37] Yeah.

[00:18:37] You don't give a shit.

[00:18:38] Oh my God.

[00:18:38] I used to fucking, I've destroyed, I mean, I destroyed the hardest I've ever have in Colorado

[00:18:44] Springs recently.

[00:18:45] But in New York, I used to fucking, not, not in Texas.

[00:18:49] Yeah.

[00:18:49] I don't think they, I don't think they like my shit here.

[00:18:51] Yeah.

[00:18:52] I, here's the thing.

[00:18:53] I think your stuff, you're our, you're on the darker side of, of, of a little bit.

[00:18:59] Yeah.

[00:19:00] Right.

[00:19:00] So I think your stuff is something that you just warm up to because I have a lot of dark

[00:19:05] shit too.

[00:19:05] And what I do is just, I try to have stuff that's a little more relatable in the beginning.

[00:19:10] They're like, Oh, okay.

[00:19:11] You're a nice guy.

[00:19:12] We can go a little bit deeper and that's how I build up to it.

[00:19:15] So maybe that's what you need to do.

[00:19:16] Well, I, I kind of, whenever I do a set, I kind of try to tell my story of like, I was

[00:19:22] raised Christian.

[00:19:23] Yeah.

[00:19:23] Um, and I do, you know, I do things like that, but you know, like I guess talking about

[00:19:30] like one of my jokes is about my dad has, it was a heroin addict, you know, like he, that's

[00:19:34] what he had with him.

[00:19:35] His dad was so abusive to him that he like, this is, this is like insane.

[00:19:40] You're my dad literally started doing heroin cause my dad, his dad was like, you're a fucking

[00:19:44] piece of shit loser over and over again.

[00:19:46] The point where he was like, yeah, I am.

[00:19:48] So he started doing heroin.

[00:19:49] Right.

[00:19:49] Trying to basically, he almost, he's, I don't think he told me.

[00:19:53] He was, he told me from my understanding, he would just only do it on the weekends,

[00:19:57] which is crazy.

[00:19:58] Weekend warrior.

[00:19:59] Yeah.

[00:19:59] For the heroin.

[00:20:00] Like he would do his whole shift.

[00:20:02] He would do his whole, he'd work nine to five.

[00:20:04] Yeah.

[00:20:04] And he would be responsible.

[00:20:05] Then he would just go do, he just do, yeah, he'd just do heroin all weekend.

[00:20:09] Damn.

[00:20:09] Which is, people do that with alcohol, you know, but so basically like he, um, yeah,

[00:20:16] that's like a, I don't really, I mean, maybe it's because I don't understand how that's

[00:20:21] really that dark in my opinion, because I guess it's a dark subject.

[00:20:26] I don't know, man.

[00:20:27] I don't like comedy where it's like, I mean, that's not true.

[00:20:30] Like Joe List is one of my favorite comedians.

[00:20:32] Yeah.

[00:20:32] And he talks about the dentist and shit.

[00:20:34] Yeah.

[00:20:34] He's like one of the clean, I mean, he's not clean, but his subject matter is relatively.

[00:20:39] Well, it's a lot of, it's very Seinfeld-y and, um, it's, it's about like being anxious.

[00:20:45] Yeah.

[00:20:46] Which I can relate to.

[00:20:47] Yeah.

[00:20:47] But I just kind of tell jokes about, I try to tell jokes about, you know, I try to tell

[00:20:51] a story a little bit.

[00:20:52] Yeah.

[00:20:52] And, uh, people get to know you that way better.

[00:20:55] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:20:56] So, yeah.

[00:20:57] I like your shit.

[00:20:58] Like, I don't, I don't think that people don't like it.

[00:21:00] I mean, you've seen the stuff that people like here.

[00:21:03] It's, it can go really hard.

[00:21:05] Yeah.

[00:21:05] I think it's just a matter of like, give it like a couple minutes of you like, Hey man,

[00:21:10] toilet paper.

[00:21:11] I don't know.

[00:21:12] Well, it's, I've noticed this.

[00:21:13] So when I went to Colorado Springs and I did, I did one of my jokes about Alcoholics Anonymous

[00:21:19] and I used the example, uh, like I'll just say real quick.

[00:21:24] It's like, I, when I went to AA, when I was 19, they gave me questions with a pamphlet

[00:21:30] and they said like, look, you might be an alcoholic if you say yes to any of these questions.

[00:21:35] Yeah.

[00:21:35] And I remember reading them as a kid and being, this is fucking silly.

[00:21:38] Some of them.

[00:21:39] Cause it was like, one of them was like, do you leave a party if there's no more alcohol

[00:21:42] left?

[00:21:43] And everyone goes, what?

[00:21:44] And then I go, yeah, why would you say that party sucks?

[00:21:47] I was like, would you hang out a library for random books?

[00:21:50] And that kills everywhere except here.

[00:21:53] Really?

[00:21:54] They just stare at me.

[00:21:56] Literally, it'll be funny.

[00:21:57] And I'll say, would you hang out a library if you ran a books?

[00:21:59] No, you'd leave.

[00:22:00] Cause that library sucks.

[00:22:01] You're there for the books.

[00:22:02] Dies down.

[00:22:03] No laughs.

[00:22:03] Yeah.

[00:22:04] And I'm just like, I said it to some random guy I met at the bar the other night.

[00:22:07] I was like, why is that?

[00:22:08] And he goes, cause they don't fucking read here, dude.

[00:22:12] And I was just like, that's, is that it?

[00:22:14] And he was just like, yeah.

[00:22:16] And I was like, wow.

[00:22:18] But it's like, do they read every, how do you know?

[00:22:21] People read.

[00:22:21] I'm guessing.

[00:22:22] Of course they read.

[00:22:23] Just the certain audiences don't.

[00:22:25] I don't know.

[00:22:25] I just don't understand.

[00:22:27] Dude, it literally, as I was telling that joke in Colorado Springs on stage, I was like,

[00:22:31] this is my bomb as I'm saying it.

[00:22:33] And I said it, huge laughter.

[00:22:35] And I was like, all right.

[00:22:36] I was like, this is.

[00:22:37] So I'm like, so here I'm just kind of like, you know, I don't know.

[00:22:43] I just fucking hated here.

[00:22:46] Dude, it's weird.

[00:22:48] Cause I've, I've done it in LA.

[00:22:52] I've done it in, in like, it might be my attitude.

[00:22:55] Nevada areas.

[00:22:56] I've done it in Utah and I've done it here.

[00:23:00] And there's always been some form of adjustment that I've had to make in some way in the sense

[00:23:06] of like, maybe the way I approached the beginning of it.

[00:23:10] Something like Utah, you can like talk about whatever from the get go.

[00:23:14] They don't give a shit, dude.

[00:23:15] Mormons are a lot of that thing stuff is almost like, I think it's like a cult.

[00:23:20] I don't, I mean, I don't, sorry guys.

[00:23:22] I don't know.

[00:23:22] It seems like a cult.

[00:23:23] So, but the guys, they have like a, like a super dark sense of humor.

[00:23:28] So it's like, interesting.

[00:23:29] Very interesting.

[00:23:31] And Nevada, like some things, I mean, I didn't do it much.

[00:23:36] I did like Vegas, one thing in Vegas.

[00:23:38] And I did a few things in, in Mesquite, which is like the border with Southern Utah.

[00:23:47] And the stuff that I did there, like some of it would hit.

[00:23:50] And then the stuff that I did in Vegas, I did, I did like a few like wise guys.

[00:23:56] Actually, have you been to the wise guys in Vegas?

[00:23:58] No.

[00:23:58] It's a fucking great room, man.

[00:24:00] Like I did like three open mics there and I did very well in all three open mics.

[00:24:04] I'm like, oh man, this is actually kind of nice doing an open mic stuff.

[00:24:08] And then I did one of those shows, like it was at a bar.

[00:24:13] And I did pretty like decently, right?

[00:24:16] So I'm like, okay, they, they, they like this stuff.

[00:24:18] And then in LA, dude, like at least at the comedy clubs, they didn't give a shit.

[00:24:23] Like as long as your stuff was funny, they did not give a shit.

[00:24:25] Yeah.

[00:24:26] But if you would go to like some, like, have you been to LA?

[00:24:30] Yeah.

[00:24:30] Are you familiar with like Silver Lake?

[00:24:32] Yeah.

[00:24:33] Silver Lake is like a bunch of hippies and, and what's the, what's the word I'm, I'm forgetting.

[00:24:43] Homeless by choice?

[00:24:46] No, but it's like a super crusty people.

[00:24:51] Crust punks.

[00:24:52] Yeah.

[00:24:54] Like the people who ride trains and shit.

[00:24:56] I used to be, I used to get in fights with all those guys.

[00:24:58] I forgot the term, but it's like very like anal people.

[00:25:02] And they're like, oh, like, like the, like super woke shit.

[00:25:06] Dude, I did a joke about religion.

[00:25:08] It was an open mic, right?

[00:25:10] Yeah.

[00:25:10] An open mic.

[00:25:11] And they kicked me out of the open mic.

[00:25:13] Also.

[00:25:14] Yeah.

[00:25:14] Jesus fucking Christ.

[00:25:15] Really?

[00:25:16] Yeah.

[00:25:16] Granted, the guy before me was like doing jokes about rape.

[00:25:20] And yeah.

[00:25:21] And just, and then I went right after him and then just like, hey, this guy, white guys,

[00:25:25] huh?

[00:25:25] And then they, I was just making fun.

[00:25:27] Yeah.

[00:25:27] That's why LA is a bad rap, dude.

[00:25:30] The LA comedy scene is fucking garbage because it's like literally white and you're not even

[00:25:34] fucking white.

[00:25:35] Yeah.

[00:25:35] You just look, I hate, it's like, they are so racist, dude.

[00:25:40] Dude.

[00:25:40] And I didn't even go by Hal back then.

[00:25:42] I went by Halil.

[00:25:43] So.

[00:25:44] Yeah, dude.

[00:25:44] They were like, he's a fucking white guy.

[00:25:45] Yeah.

[00:25:45] Fucking white guy.

[00:25:46] Dude.

[00:25:46] It's, it's so racist, dude.

[00:25:48] Yeah.

[00:25:48] They're so fucking racist and they're like, we're not racist.

[00:25:51] It's like, yeah, you are.

[00:25:52] Yeah.

[00:25:52] You are.

[00:25:52] You just fucking pretend to be assholes.

[00:25:55] Well, yeah.

[00:25:56] My friend Rojan told me that the comedy, he used to call it the commies, the commie store,

[00:26:00] not the commies, the commies store because, um, uh, they stopped hiring white guys.

[00:26:05] Really?

[00:26:06] They like, they're like, we don't hire white guys anymore.

[00:26:08] That's interesting.

[00:26:09] I don't know about comedy, but like door guys.

[00:26:10] They're like, we have, so they want the look of a black.

[00:26:13] It's all about what looks best.

[00:26:14] Yeah.

[00:26:15] So it's all optics.

[00:26:16] It's all horse shit.

[00:26:18] Yeah.

[00:26:18] Fake fucking shit.

[00:26:19] I mean, if you, if you go to the comedy store, like most of the lineup is white people,

[00:26:23] dude.

[00:26:23] So.

[00:26:24] I don't, yeah, I don't know what to fucking, I mean, it's, I don't know.

[00:26:28] Um, but yeah, like, but I, I get what you're saying, dude.

[00:26:31] So.

[00:26:32] Well, the reason why I think New York used to have the,

[00:26:36] best crowds before, before it got like, yeah, before it got really bad.

[00:26:41] But the thing is, you know, well, when I was in New York, I couldn't say retard from the

[00:26:43] beginning.

[00:26:44] I couldn't say retard.

[00:26:45] I have a fucking story that I kills about it, but like people get nervous, not even saying

[00:26:51] the word retard.

[00:26:52] I could say mentally challenged or anything.

[00:26:54] Close to the.

[00:26:54] They don't like it because it's about mentally challenged people.

[00:26:56] Mm.

[00:26:57] Also, my friend, uh, this is an example too.

[00:27:01] My friend, um, he had a joke about, you ever seen the people on the subway who dance on

[00:27:12] the poles?

[00:27:12] Mm-hmm.

[00:27:14] Showtime dancers they're called?

[00:27:15] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:27:15] So for anybody who doesn't know, basically it's all black kids.

[00:27:19] Let's just be honest.

[00:27:20] It's all black kids.

[00:27:21] Yeah.

[00:27:21] They come on and they swing around a pole like a stripper and then they dance and then they

[00:27:25] play music.

[00:27:26] I hate them.

[00:27:27] They're annoying.

[00:27:28] Not black people, but like, you know what I'm saying?

[00:27:30] Yeah.

[00:27:30] Like those kids.

[00:27:31] Yeah.

[00:27:31] They're annoying because it's, it's just loud.

[00:27:33] Yeah.

[00:27:34] Yeah.

[00:27:34] It's loud.

[00:27:35] It's annoying.

[00:27:35] I don't like it.

[00:27:36] Um, they want money for it.

[00:27:38] Um, I remember my friend Zach was like, what's the end game in that?

[00:27:41] Like, what's, what are you doing?

[00:27:42] Yeah.

[00:27:42] Where do you go from there?

[00:27:43] They, the whole crowd, like their buttholes got super tight.

[00:27:47] They got super quiet.

[00:27:49] And I remember just watching the video and being like, why did that happen?

[00:27:52] I was like, oh, because in their minds they know that they're all black and they're going,

[00:27:57] he's making fun of black people.

[00:27:58] It's like, that's some of the New York crowds.

[00:28:01] But the thing is I can kind of handle that shit because if I know they're being all pussies

[00:28:05] like that, I'll just fucking yell at them.

[00:28:07] Yeah.

[00:28:07] Um, it's just New York has, um, when it was like I said before all the woke shit,

[00:28:13] it was the best crowds because it was such a different, New York is a huge pot.

[00:28:19] Yeah, it's a melting pot.

[00:28:19] A melting pot.

[00:28:20] A melting pot.

[00:28:21] So you would go to certain areas where you'd be like, this is all motherfucking dudes from

[00:28:25] New York.

[00:28:25] Like deep into Brooklyn and shit like that.

[00:28:27] Yeah.

[00:28:27] The ones that never go anywhere else.

[00:28:29] Yeah.

[00:28:30] Those are going to be the crowds that are like New Yorkers.

[00:28:32] Right?

[00:28:32] Mm-hmm.

[00:28:32] But like you go to like Brooklyn and certain places, they're all from different places.

[00:28:37] It's just somewhere from somewhere else.

[00:28:37] Yes.

[00:28:37] And they're the pains in the ass.

[00:28:39] No, I mean it's, it was, it was, well you learned to see what was actually really funny.

[00:28:44] Okay.

[00:28:44] Because you'd be like, if this works with everybody, chances are it's going to fucking

[00:28:48] work everywhere.

[00:28:49] Yeah.

[00:28:49] But you come down here and you're mostly doing standup for Texas people.

[00:28:55] Like Austin has a, you know, Austin has a tiny little bit of a melting pot, but it's

[00:28:59] not giant like New York.

[00:29:00] No, no, no.

[00:29:01] It's, it's.

[00:29:01] Like if you do any of the big shows here, they're Texas, it's on 6th Street, it's Texas

[00:29:06] tourists mostly.

[00:29:07] Yeah.

[00:29:07] And you're, and you gotta literally kind of just be, you know, but you know, I've done

[00:29:11] my set at like Shakespeare and literally no one was laughing and I got off stage and

[00:29:17] then some dude came up to me and was like, dude, you were, that was fucking amazing.

[00:29:20] And I was like, thank you.

[00:29:21] But it's like, why don't you laugh?

[00:29:23] Yeah.

[00:29:23] It's because people are afraid to laugh by themselves.

[00:29:26] I think.

[00:29:28] No, that's a big, yeah.

[00:29:30] That's a big thing.

[00:29:31] But it's like if, but that's the most frustrating part is like, if you literally, they're not

[00:29:36] laughing at a joke about libraries where I'm just like, I'm like, what the fuck?

[00:29:41] I'm like, also like the other night, my friend Melissa, not going to, well, I shouldn't even

[00:29:49] say her name.

[00:29:49] Who cares?

[00:29:50] We'll leave it out.

[00:29:51] I'm not going to say, well, I'm not going to say her last name.

[00:29:54] She was like, yeah, awesome crowds are retarded.

[00:29:56] Yeah.

[00:29:57] And I, that's the first thing I talked to her about.

[00:29:59] Cause I was like, someone's off here.

[00:30:01] And she's like, yeah, they're dumb dude.

[00:30:03] Now I'm like, all right.

[00:30:04] Thank you for letting me know.

[00:30:05] Because I thought, I thought I was like, what's going on?

[00:30:07] Yeah.

[00:30:08] You know?

[00:30:08] So, but yeah, that's how I feel about it.

[00:30:12] Okay.

[00:30:14] So I had the same, the place I was telling you about in Silver Lake, I had the same experience.

[00:30:19] I had people that they were going like, cause they were laughing, but they were holding

[00:30:23] it in cause they didn't want to laugh in front of people.

[00:30:26] So when you're in that, in a situation like that, it's like, well, why the fuck are you

[00:30:31] even here?

[00:30:31] If you don't want to laugh.

[00:30:32] I've yelled at people before.

[00:30:34] Yeah.

[00:30:34] Um, I've yelled at them and they've lightened up.

[00:30:36] I, one time I had a, I had this video, I actually deleted it recently cause I lost space on my

[00:30:40] laptop or Google drive or whatever.

[00:30:43] But I remember it was a video that I was using to try to get into festivals and the

[00:30:48] fucking host of the show told everybody that they were so just like a horrible crowd that

[00:30:53] I just went, I went, Oh boy, I'm not going to use this video.

[00:30:57] And then everyone started laughing.

[00:30:58] Like all the comics started laughing.

[00:30:59] Yeah.

[00:31:00] And I was just like, all right guys, come on.

[00:31:01] And I started snapping at them.

[00:31:02] I was like, let's go.

[00:31:03] And I was just like, and then they started.

[00:31:05] Yeah.

[00:31:05] Actually hanging out.

[00:31:06] Cause you can literally be like, you guys kind of suck.

[00:31:09] Yeah.

[00:31:09] Yeah.

[00:31:10] Yeah.

[00:31:10] That's how you can turn crowds around.

[00:31:12] I've literally told crowds that they fucking suck.

[00:31:14] And I remember I found a bunch of recordings of my old standup on my phone because I was

[00:31:20] like, I didn't know I had these.

[00:31:21] It was in New York.

[00:31:22] I remember I was listening to one show where they weren't laughing at shit.

[00:31:24] I remember just being yelling at them and being like, come on guys.

[00:31:27] Like, and they started to pick it up.

[00:31:30] It's so funny because when I was in New York, man, I was like, I think I was like, when

[00:31:36] I was like six years in fucking phenomenal.

[00:31:39] I was like, that's when I was the most warmed up just like going on every night.

[00:31:44] And I was just literally didn't give a fuck.

[00:31:45] Yeah.

[00:31:46] And I was just literally just like yelling at people if they weren't thinking, if they

[00:31:49] didn't think it was funny.

[00:31:50] I was like, you're, you're, come on.

[00:31:51] You're the problem.

[00:31:52] Not me.

[00:31:53] Yeah.

[00:31:53] Cause it just shit kills.

[00:31:54] Everybody else is laughing.

[00:31:56] Yeah.

[00:31:56] But yeah, it was, um, that's the thing.

[00:31:58] I feel like there's two types of bombing.

[00:32:00] There's bombing where you're on stage.

[00:32:02] It's not fun.

[00:32:03] You're panicking.

[00:32:03] They are making fun of you in their heads for, or just like awkward and not.

[00:32:08] It's rough.

[00:32:09] But then there's bombing where like the crowd's not feeling it and you're just like, this fucking

[00:32:13] crowd sucks.

[00:32:13] Yeah.

[00:32:14] And you're like, whatever.

[00:32:15] And you get off stage.

[00:32:17] You know?

[00:32:18] No, I get it.

[00:32:19] I tried to always avoid the one where you're panicking.

[00:32:21] Oh, well the moment they can tell you're panicking, that's when it just goes down.

[00:32:26] It was weird because I like, when I first got here, I was 13 years in and I started to

[00:32:32] get, but the thing is I hadn't really done standup that much for two years almost because

[00:32:38] of COVID and shit like that.

[00:32:40] So I was rusty.

[00:32:41] So when I came here, I was panic bombing and I was just like, and I was like, what the hell's

[00:32:47] going on?

[00:32:47] It's weird because I didn't, it's like, you know how to ride a bike, but you're fucking

[00:32:52] falling over and you're like, still like relearning some shit.

[00:32:56] Yeah.

[00:32:56] And you're getting frustrated with yourself.

[00:32:57] It was like, I used to be able to fucking do this shit.

[00:32:59] Yeah.

[00:33:00] And then, you know, I would be, yeah, I would be panic bombing.

[00:33:03] And then also cause it was like, I want to get booked and I can't, I'm, you know, but

[00:33:09] also.

[00:33:10] Yeah.

[00:33:10] Putting that pressure on, I understand what that happened.

[00:33:13] But there is also, there is also, I will say this about Austin.

[00:33:18] There is the difference between New York and Austin.

[00:33:21] I've noticed there is a huge pressure on you to always kill here.

[00:33:26] But comics won't.

[00:33:27] Even at open mics, dude, it's ridiculous.

[00:33:29] Comics will not look you in the eyes if you don't do well.

[00:33:32] Yeah.

[00:33:32] And you're like, I did that.

[00:33:34] Man, I did well like two mics ago and now I bombed at this one.

[00:33:38] And then now suddenly.

[00:33:40] Which is, that's why hacky material is being done here because people are just feeling pressured.

[00:33:46] Honestly, if you're doing the mothership, do all your best stuff, obviously.

[00:33:50] Right?

[00:33:50] Yeah.

[00:33:50] Don't do anything new.

[00:33:51] Yeah.

[00:33:51] But your open mics are where you try shit.

[00:33:53] Yeah.

[00:33:53] And also just, dude, I've literally seen somebody bomb on stage and I fucking was dying laughing.

[00:34:01] Nobody, he was not doing well.

[00:34:02] Yeah.

[00:34:03] You know who he is too.

[00:34:04] I'm not going to mention his name.

[00:34:05] But like, you know who he is.

[00:34:06] And I went up to him and I was like, dude, that was fucking awesome.

[00:34:08] And he was like flustered because it was like he was not doing well.

[00:34:11] But it's like I went up to him and I was like, that was fucking amazing, man.

[00:34:16] That isn't, that was a, that's a very big New York thing where, because it's like, it's

[00:34:20] like the comics are on each other side.

[00:34:22] Yeah.

[00:34:22] You can see if something's funny or not.

[00:34:25] Doesn't it?

[00:34:25] I've never had a comic come up to me and be like, dude, that was funny.

[00:34:28] Fuck that crap.

[00:34:29] Yeah.

[00:34:30] It's just like they're on the side of the crowd here.

[00:34:32] It's weird.

[00:34:32] Yeah.

[00:34:33] Which I don't like.

[00:34:34] It's especially, especially like I had a.

[00:34:38] The crowds are one that are stupid.

[00:34:39] The comic, you know.

[00:34:40] The thing is, that's if they're doing hacky fucking shit and then they just want to get

[00:34:44] the kill.

[00:34:45] It's like I can go on all day, dude.

[00:34:48] I fucking hate.

[00:34:49] I'm leaving.

[00:34:50] Yeah.

[00:34:50] I know.

[00:34:50] I know you don't like hearing.

[00:34:53] Yeah.

[00:34:53] Go ahead.

[00:34:54] I'm sorry.

[00:34:54] No, but I know what you mean.

[00:34:56] Like my first year here, I had that whole thing where I just moved from southern Utah

[00:35:03] where everybody was supportive and the crowds, even if they didn't like you, they would still

[00:35:08] appreciate you or whatever.

[00:35:10] So I moved here and, you know, most of the mics here are actually just performing in front

[00:35:16] of comics.

[00:35:18] Sorry to interrupt.

[00:35:19] You know what I think it is?

[00:35:20] I think it's because it killed Tony.

[00:35:21] Probably.

[00:35:22] It's because if you bomb, it's like this thing where it's like, well, now it's time to make

[00:35:26] fun of you.

[00:35:26] But it's like, didn't you see any of the stuff that was funny in there?

[00:35:31] Yeah.

[00:35:31] It just might have not landed or whatever.

[00:35:34] Yeah.

[00:35:35] I was lucky on my Kill Tony clip because I did my set dead silent first joke.

[00:35:41] Then that's why I put it up on the new, my clip from Colorado because I put that up on

[00:35:47] purpose.

[00:35:47] Yeah.

[00:35:47] Because like it fucking killed.

[00:35:49] Yeah.

[00:35:50] And didn't kill in Mothership.

[00:35:51] Maybe because I was nervous.

[00:35:53] It didn't do the timing right or whatever, but I don't know.

[00:35:55] So basically, basically you just moved here too, right?

[00:35:59] I had been here.

[00:36:00] I had been in, I had started doing standup in January in Austin.

[00:36:07] I had just moved in December.

[00:36:08] I didn't have any money because my project got delayed.

[00:36:11] So I started doing it in January and I got on Kill.

[00:36:13] I didn't sign up to Kill Tony until March.

[00:36:15] And the first time I ever signed up, I got on and I was the first bucket poll.

[00:36:19] So it was very overwhelming.

[00:36:20] And then Dave Attell was the fucking guest.

[00:36:22] He's like an idol.

[00:36:24] He's the goat.

[00:36:24] One of the gods of poverty.

[00:36:26] New York god.

[00:36:27] Yeah.

[00:36:27] So, and then David Spade too.

[00:36:29] So I was like very nervous, but you know, when I was done, Tony was like, all right, that

[00:36:36] was a solid minute.

[00:36:37] And then Dave Attell said he liked it.

[00:36:38] Yeah.

[00:36:39] So they were nice to me.

[00:36:41] They didn't make fun of me at all.

[00:36:43] Dave Attell was cracking.

[00:36:44] It was impossible for me to fucking even have an interview.

[00:36:47] Dave Attell was cracking jokes.

[00:36:48] But also I was super nervous.

[00:36:50] Because it was Dave Attell?

[00:36:52] Yeah.

[00:36:52] Yeah.

[00:36:52] I was starstruck, like crazy.

[00:36:53] And I was just-

[00:36:54] Dude, he's fucking incredible.

[00:36:56] I wasn't giving him anything, I think.

[00:36:58] But like, they weren't mean, dude.

[00:37:00] Tony was like really nice to me.

[00:37:02] Well, he saw you actually had jokes.

[00:37:05] Good jokes.

[00:37:05] Yeah.

[00:37:06] So, and he, I've seen him appreciate, like for all the flack he gets, I've seen him,

[00:37:11] even if the set doesn't go well, he's like, that was a solid bit.

[00:37:14] Yeah.

[00:37:14] Whatever.

[00:37:15] So he does appreciate that.

[00:37:16] Yeah.

[00:37:16] Because he's a fucking comic.

[00:37:17] And like, the thing is about Kill Tony crowds, they thought I was bad.

[00:37:23] And then they were probably like waiting to see what Tuck and Tony said because they're

[00:37:26] fucking sheep.

[00:37:27] Yeah.

[00:37:27] Yeah.

[00:37:27] A lot of people here are sheep.

[00:37:29] They don't, they go, what's funny?

[00:37:30] And Tony goes, that guy's funny.

[00:37:31] The retarded guy.

[00:37:32] Well, the guy with the brain tumor.

[00:37:35] Yeah.

[00:37:35] Not the brain tumor, brain injury.

[00:37:36] Whatever.

[00:37:37] It's insane.

[00:37:38] Well, the thing is like, he's getting bullied apparently, that guy.

[00:37:40] Really?

[00:37:40] Drew Nickens.

[00:37:41] Really?

[00:37:41] Yeah.

[00:37:41] It's hard to call him retarded, but he has a brain, something wrong with his brain.

[00:37:44] He's got a, he's got like a TBI or something.

[00:37:46] Yeah.

[00:37:46] Well, he's getting cyber bullied or whatever you call it.

[00:37:48] Really?

[00:37:48] Like people were like telling him to quit comedy because they suck so bad.

[00:37:51] But Tony's up there being like, that was funny.

[00:37:53] It's like, no, it wasn't.

[00:37:54] I think what he's doing with him is-

[00:37:56] It's not good.

[00:37:57] It's like a development thing.

[00:37:59] Like he's trying to develop.

[00:38:00] Well, from what I've heard, I didn't really watch William Montgomery when he started on

[00:38:04] Kill Tony.

[00:38:04] He wants to see somebody rise to better.

[00:38:08] Yeah.

[00:38:08] And because like when I watched his first episode-

[00:38:11] William Montgomery was funny though.

[00:38:12] Yeah.

[00:38:12] Go ahead.

[00:38:13] When I watched his first episode, I thought it was endearing that the guy just came out

[00:38:18] and then eventually like, you know, every time they brought him out, he got better

[00:38:21] and better like with the confidence.

[00:38:22] Yeah.

[00:38:23] Yeah.

[00:38:23] And then ever since then, like his sets aren't really that good.

[00:38:27] Because he talks about Yu-Gi-Oh, dude.

[00:38:28] Yeah.

[00:38:29] It's interesting what he's talking about.

[00:38:33] Nice guy.

[00:38:34] I mean, you know, he lives in my apartment complex.

[00:38:37] Oh, really?

[00:38:37] Yeah.

[00:38:38] But like, I don't know, man.

[00:38:40] I think he's one of those guys because he, Tony's even mentioned it.

[00:38:45] Like, hey, you're a regular for the sense of like we want to see your progression.

[00:38:50] And he like, he said it out loud, I think, because he wants to, he wants the crowd to

[00:38:53] understand, hey, this guy's here for that.

[00:38:56] I have not seen him on any new episodes though.

[00:38:58] No, no.

[00:38:59] They, especially like-

[00:39:01] They were probably like, go get better.

[00:39:03] Yeah.

[00:39:03] Well, he bombed most of the, whenever they put him out, he like, he just bombed a lot.

[00:39:08] Yeah.

[00:39:08] I mean, that's the thing though.

[00:39:10] Like, to bring it back to what I originally said is I think in this scene, because of

[00:39:15] Kill Tony, when you don't do good, there's not like this, hey man, that was actually-

[00:39:21] Yeah.

[00:39:21] They don't appreciate that.

[00:39:22] Yeah.

[00:39:22] That was actually a good joke.

[00:39:23] They just go, ugh, you bombed.

[00:39:25] Yeah.

[00:39:25] Because they want to make fun of you.

[00:39:26] Dude, it's mean here.

[00:39:28] Yeah.

[00:39:28] It's because it's insult.

[00:39:29] It's very quick.

[00:39:30] Because insult comedy has come back.

[00:39:32] Yeah.

[00:39:32] Because of Tony Hinchcliffe.

[00:39:33] Yeah.

[00:39:34] He's an insult comic, right?

[00:39:35] Yeah.

[00:39:35] But his, I've seen his stuff.

[00:39:36] I like his stand-up.

[00:39:38] Yeah.

[00:39:39] He's got, he's very against the woke stuff.

[00:39:42] He's like, he did stuff about trans people.

[00:39:44] Like, his special at Comedy Store was good.

[00:39:47] Yeah.

[00:39:47] Nothing memorable really to me.

[00:39:48] No, but I watched that.

[00:39:49] Yeah, it was good.

[00:39:50] But he just blends it in with a lot of crowd work.

[00:39:52] Exactly.

[00:39:53] So you don't know what bit is an actual bit and what's crowd work.

[00:39:55] I like his, my style.

[00:39:57] His style is similar to mine.

[00:39:58] Yeah.

[00:39:58] Where it's kind of like off the cuff.

[00:39:59] You kind of feel like, because like, I will abandon my whole act if I feel like I

[00:40:05] do a feel like doing crowd work.

[00:40:06] No, I get it.

[00:40:07] Like, it's, that's more interesting to me than fucking, you know, doing my, but, you

[00:40:12] know, but then he also, he's an insult comic.

[00:40:14] Like, he's been, he loves roasts and, you know, the roast battles are popular now.

[00:40:18] Mm-hmm.

[00:40:18] So like, if a whole scene is kind of based on like, if doing well on Kill Tony and like,

[00:40:25] bombing is like, you're, if you bomb if someone's mean to you about it, that's what people

[00:40:31] think comedy is now.

[00:40:32] Yeah.

[00:40:33] It's like literally like, oof, that guy fucking sucked.

[00:40:35] It's like.

[00:40:36] Yeah.

[00:40:36] I've literally bombed in New York and had like one or two crowd members come up and go,

[00:40:40] I thought that was fucking amazing.

[00:40:41] Yeah.

[00:40:42] I thought that was great.

[00:40:42] Thank you so much.

[00:40:43] Yeah.

[00:40:43] It happened in Austin recently too.

[00:40:46] I did 25 minutes at Roscoe's with Dave Borowski, dual headlined.

[00:40:51] And there was a girl at the bar and she was like, you were so funny.

[00:40:55] I was like, thank you so much.

[00:40:56] Cause I was, it was a rough crowd.

[00:40:58] I don't, I need to tell you about that after the fucking podcast.

[00:41:00] It was insane.

[00:41:01] Yeah.

[00:41:02] But go ahead.

[00:41:03] But yeah, dude, no, I get it.

[00:41:05] Like I used to, the way I would do stuff is I would basically write on stage.

[00:41:10] I would write something out, but I wouldn't stick to the script.

[00:41:12] Yeah.

[00:41:13] And then I would just, you know, riff and see what I can.

[00:41:16] And I, and after like a few sets, I would like piece it together to see what works.

[00:41:20] But that involved a lot of bombing and people wouldn't, I don't think people appreciate

[00:41:24] it.

[00:41:24] It's hard to doing.

[00:41:25] No.

[00:41:26] So I, this is what I feel too.

[00:41:28] This is not the scene to write on stage.

[00:41:31] Yeah.

[00:41:32] It's not really that scene.

[00:41:33] It's a lot of one liners.

[00:41:35] The mics are only three minutes long in New York.

[00:41:37] I used to do 10 minute mics and like, that's where I would learn to write on stage.

[00:41:42] Yeah.

[00:41:42] And I would say shit and people would be like, dude, that was great.

[00:41:45] And I would just record it.

[00:41:46] And I go, oh my God, I didn't even, that thought just happened.

[00:41:50] Yeah.

[00:41:50] You know?

[00:41:51] So.

[00:41:51] There is something to writing on stage.

[00:41:53] Cause there's.

[00:41:53] That's how Louis CK does it.

[00:41:54] There's things you say, like when you're actually performing and then there's things

[00:41:58] that you write.

[00:41:58] Right.

[00:41:59] Yeah.

[00:41:59] So if you just meld them together.

[00:42:01] Yeah.

[00:42:01] It's, um, I honestly miss the new, I really wish it didn't turn into this woke, horrible

[00:42:09] thing.

[00:42:09] I miss it so much.

[00:42:10] I think it's coming back from what I've heard.

[00:42:12] Yeah.

[00:42:12] It's, yeah.

[00:42:13] People are going to get lean, lenient, more lenient.

[00:42:15] You know what I mean?

[00:42:15] If you go to like Kill Tony, like the fucking Madison Square Garden, it's sold out.

[00:42:19] So there's obviously tons of Kill Tony fans in New York.

[00:42:22] But, um, also it's just like, I would never move back there because it's just, it's too

[00:42:26] expensive.

[00:42:27] There's too many fucking people.

[00:42:28] Uh, I would go and I would love to go do shows there again.

[00:42:32] Um, you know, I can handle the fucking woke people.

[00:42:35] Yeah.

[00:42:35] Yeah.

[00:42:36] Yeah.

[00:42:36] But when there's someone staring at me like, huh?

[00:42:38] Yeah.

[00:42:38] You go to the library, you fucking sister.

[00:42:40] Like also I guarantee like I come off to a Texan as like a fucking gay guy or just

[00:42:45] like a sissy boy.

[00:42:46] You know what I'm saying?

[00:42:46] I, I look like, you know, I mean, I wouldn't say that you look like a sissy, but well also

[00:42:52] it's just like, you know, a smarty pant.

[00:42:54] You know what I'm talking about?

[00:42:55] Like you do have this like, like intellectual thing to you.

[00:42:59] Yes.

[00:42:59] Well, thank you.

[00:43:00] But like people don't like that shit and I don't give a fuck.

[00:43:03] Yeah.

[00:43:03] Who cares?

[00:43:04] You know, I, it's all at the end of the day is like building your audience and your audience

[00:43:09] will find you.

[00:43:10] And also, man, I think, I don't think the way you see what's going on with you is actually

[00:43:17] that bad.

[00:43:18] Like I, I do think, I, I do think people appreciate you.

[00:43:22] No, I think so too.

[00:43:24] I just, um, you're tired of it.

[00:43:27] Oh yeah.

[00:43:27] I want to get the hell out of here.

[00:43:28] No, I, my plan is to visit.

[00:43:30] Like I'm going to be talking with Dave Vorowski about probably co-producing that show with

[00:43:36] the Voroskos.

[00:43:37] I mean, it's going to be, I'm not moving anywhere for another year.

[00:43:40] Yeah.

[00:43:40] You're still, and so enjoy what you have here though.

[00:43:43] Exactly.

[00:43:43] That way you're not bitter.

[00:43:44] Yeah.

[00:43:45] But, um, but it also makes me funnier when I don't give a fuck cause I don't care about

[00:43:49] advancing here now.

[00:43:50] Dude, I, yeah.

[00:43:52] Anybody I know that doesn't give a fuck is just funnier cause they just don't give a

[00:43:57] fuck.

[00:43:57] And that's when I started to like get better here.

[00:44:00] Yeah.

[00:44:01] Like I, the more I, like I still want to do well and all that stuff, but I don't give

[00:44:07] a fuck in the sense of, I'm just going to say whatever.

[00:44:10] And if it goes, it goes.

[00:44:11] If it doesn't, it doesn't.

[00:44:12] Yeah.

[00:44:13] Yeah.

[00:44:13] No, it's, um, yeah.

[00:44:17] I mean, I did a mic the other day and I was telling jokes and nobody was laughing.

[00:44:22] And then I got off stage and one guy was like, dude, I really liked your set.

[00:44:24] And I was like, somebody, that's the people you got to realize and appreciate.

[00:44:28] There's one motherfucker.

[00:44:29] But the thing is, that's true.

[00:44:30] Everybody should not be laughing.

[00:44:32] Yeah.

[00:44:33] But, um, it's nice to hear like one or two people fucking laughing so you can go, okay.

[00:44:37] But you never know.

[00:44:38] It's just people are afraid to laugh or it's an open mic.

[00:44:41] Nobody wants to laugh.

[00:44:42] It's all comics.

[00:44:43] But yeah, um, I, I'm, I'm, I think the not giving a fuck is going to be good.

[00:44:50] Yeah.

[00:44:51] Um, that's why also a year here, it gives me a lot of time to think it over and decide

[00:44:56] if it's a good move to move or not.

[00:44:58] Also, if I move to Colorado, I know two people that will fast track me into fucking scene there.

[00:45:06] Way faster than here.

[00:45:08] You know?

[00:45:08] Yeah.

[00:45:09] So, if I do co-produce a show once a month, I will be back every month.

[00:45:13] Yeah.

[00:45:13] Once a week, every month.

[00:45:14] So, once a, one weekend every month.

[00:45:16] How far is the drive from Colorado?

[00:45:18] 13 hours, I wouldn't do that.

[00:45:19] That's not a sign of that.

[00:45:19] Uh, Frontier, you can, from Denver, from Denver to Austin, it's a hundred dollars round

[00:45:24] trip.

[00:45:24] That's not bad.

[00:45:25] If you, it's beautiful, dude.

[00:45:27] A hundred dollars round trip.

[00:45:27] But that's like, if you can plan it out great, then yeah.

[00:45:31] It's.

[00:45:31] How, is Frontier like a very close to Spirit or?

[00:45:35] Yeah, something like that.

[00:45:36] Yeah.

[00:45:37] It's like a Spirit.

[00:45:37] Actually, didn't they buy Spirit?

[00:45:39] Probably.

[00:45:39] Yeah.

[00:45:40] Yeah.

[00:45:40] But yeah, it's literally, in the Austin airport, they have their own little section in the back

[00:45:45] because nobody fuck.

[00:45:46] It's like one plane.

[00:45:47] That's it.

[00:45:47] It's just one, one little terminal.

[00:45:49] Literally, one terminal.

[00:45:51] And it's got its own little store and shit.

[00:45:52] But basically, I looked it up.

[00:45:54] If I wanted to go to December, um, it's literally $40 there and $60 back.

[00:46:02] That's not bad.

[00:46:02] A hundred dollars, dude, for round trip.

[00:46:04] That's not bad.

[00:46:04] Uh, to Denver though.

[00:46:06] If you want to go to Colorado Springs, it's, they don't go to Colorado Springs.

[00:46:08] How far is the drive?

[00:46:10] An hour from Denver.

[00:46:11] That's not bad.

[00:46:11] Yeah.

[00:46:12] But if, it was a, when I got there one night, I just paid, I paid like $150 for Uber.

[00:46:17] Oh.

[00:46:18] Yeah.

[00:46:18] Cause I get down, cause I didn't plan it right.

[00:46:21] So, is it worth it?

[00:46:22] If I have a plan, then it's better.

[00:46:24] Yeah.

[00:46:25] I'm still, it's still, I mean, $250 is not horrible if you really think about it.

[00:46:31] No.

[00:46:31] I would, if I did live there, I would just drive and see if it's worth it to keep my car

[00:46:36] in parking or something.

[00:46:37] We'll just leave it somewhere and then just, um, you know, like take a hundred dollar round

[00:46:42] trip flight from Denver to Austin, spend it and, you know, the way and come back, you

[00:46:48] know, but I don't want, I want also to be a place where I go kind of often, but like,

[00:46:53] I don't know, man, it's not for me.

[00:46:55] No, I get it, man.

[00:46:56] It is a bigger scene now.

[00:46:59] Yeah.

[00:46:59] Like, I don't know where it is in the country.

[00:47:01] It might be top five.

[00:47:02] It is.

[00:47:03] I think it's Austin.

[00:47:05] I've never really done it in Chicago, but I heard Chicago is great.

[00:47:09] But Denver.

[00:47:10] I've heard mixed things about Chicago.

[00:47:13] Yeah.

[00:47:13] It's pretty woke.

[00:47:14] I heard pretty bad.

[00:47:15] Like pretty worse than New York.

[00:47:16] I think it's the worst woke.

[00:47:17] Yeah.

[00:47:17] It's worse than, it's worse than New York.

[00:47:19] Yeah.

[00:47:19] But like, I've heard, I think the top five are like gotta be New York.

[00:47:23] Austin.

[00:47:24] New York's number one.

[00:47:25] Yeah.

[00:47:25] Always.

[00:47:26] New York.

[00:47:26] Never going to change that.

[00:47:27] New York, Austin, Denver, not in any specific order, but, and then it's gotta be.

[00:47:34] LA has gotta be there.

[00:47:35] Yeah, but they're getting bad.

[00:47:36] They're still there though.

[00:47:37] I understand, but I mean, it's still a big scene.

[00:47:39] And then I'm thinking maybe, maybe Chicago or Atlanta.

[00:47:43] Maybe Atlanta's good.

[00:47:44] I've heard Philly is really good.

[00:47:46] Yeah.

[00:47:47] I don't think it's top five though.

[00:47:48] I think Atlanta's.

[00:47:49] Atlanta's getting big.

[00:47:50] I have a buddy who moved to Atlanta.

[00:47:53] Yeah.

[00:47:54] Which is like, I mean, I guess I understand.

[00:47:56] Like he, he's a guy who's really funny, but he, he like goes to a smaller scene, becomes

[00:48:02] the big fish that moves to a bigger scene, becomes the big fish.

[00:48:05] There.

[00:48:05] And I think, I like the way.

[00:48:07] What's his name?

[00:48:08] His name is Michael Madsen.

[00:48:09] Okay.

[00:48:10] I don't know that guy.

[00:48:11] Uh, he, he's open for like, uh, Neil Brennan and.

[00:48:15] Cool.

[00:48:16] And what's his face?

[00:48:17] Uh, the bald guy with the beard.

[00:48:19] Kyle Kinane.

[00:48:20] Kyle Kinane.

[00:48:20] Yeah.

[00:48:21] And, um, a couple of like Tom Pop and things like that.

[00:48:24] He'd like in Hawaii.

[00:48:25] He was like one of the, I've never been to Hawaii, but from what I've seen, he was

[00:48:28] like one of the biggest guys in Hawaii.

[00:48:30] Wow.

[00:48:31] And, uh, so he does well and that that's his approach.

[00:48:35] And I liked that.

[00:48:36] I just, cause I've, you know, I started in LA, one of the biggest scenes.

[00:48:41] I had nothing.

[00:48:42] Yeah.

[00:48:42] And then I moved to Southern Utah.

[00:48:44] Like I helped build the scene, but I still wasn't the funniest guy in the scene.

[00:48:48] But yeah, you know, I just gave myself opportunities to get better.

[00:48:51] Cause at the end of the day where you actually make progress is in front of crowds that are

[00:48:56] actually like willing to laugh at what's funny.

[00:48:59] Right.

[00:49:00] So, and then when I moved here, I'm like, well, I, I wanted to move here at some point.

[00:49:05] And when it, when the situation gave, uh, when I had the opportunity to do something, I'm

[00:49:10] like, well, Austin's getting big.

[00:49:12] Let's do that.

[00:49:12] And it, it, but it was like a big adjustment for me.

[00:49:16] Like the first year, dude, I was miserable here.

[00:49:18] Like, yeah.

[00:49:19] And here in Austin.

[00:49:20] Yeah.

[00:49:21] Yeah.

[00:49:22] I mean, how long you lived here?

[00:49:23] I've been here two years, two years and now maybe three months.

[00:49:27] Yeah.

[00:49:29] I actually, the comedy is, is, is like whatever.

[00:49:34] It's not really making me that.

[00:49:35] It's literally just Texas.

[00:49:37] I think.

[00:49:38] Yeah.

[00:49:38] Just like, it's not me, man.

[00:49:39] I like, I like mounds and trees.

[00:49:41] Yeah.

[00:49:42] I just know myself.

[00:49:43] And also the seven months of brutal heat is insane.

[00:49:45] Yeah.

[00:49:46] It's pretty bad.

[00:49:46] It's like, what were you and I talking about before?

[00:49:50] Like, even, even though I hate the winter, like comedy does, I think better when it's

[00:49:54] cold.

[00:49:55] Yeah.

[00:49:55] There is something.

[00:49:56] I mean, that, why is, why are so many people that are so funny from Boston?

[00:50:01] Yeah.

[00:50:01] Like, like New York.

[00:50:03] It's just cold there.

[00:50:04] Yeah.

[00:50:04] Cause like, I don't, cause basically I don't think that like, if you're, the heat makes

[00:50:10] people in a mood to like fucking laugh.

[00:50:14] Well, it just like, it makes you irritable.

[00:50:16] Why is it that like, for example, the, the late show with Letterman is very famous for

[00:50:20] like having the room like crisp cold.

[00:50:22] Why, why do they do that?

[00:50:23] Cause it, it's, it makes people, it makes people more prone to laugh.

[00:50:27] Right.

[00:50:27] Yeah.

[00:50:28] Keeps the crowd like on their toes and stuff.

[00:50:30] I almost, dude, I almost missed it.

[00:50:31] The other day cause it's, it was got, it got cold here and it got like this.

[00:50:36] I felt this seasonal depression in my body.

[00:50:40] Really?

[00:50:40] But I was like, I, I miss this.

[00:50:42] I was like, I was like, I like this.

[00:50:44] Yeah.

[00:50:44] Yeah.

[00:50:44] It was like better than a fucking hundred degree heat every day.

[00:50:48] Oh no, dude.

[00:50:48] It was, you felt like the, the seasonal depression with the cold?

[00:50:51] I felt like the, well, the, like, it's like a comfort.

[00:50:54] It's like a sadness, but it's not depression.

[00:50:56] Something like, like it just feels like home to you.

[00:50:58] Yeah.

[00:50:59] It just felt like nice.

[00:51:00] I was just like, I missed this.

[00:51:02] And I was like, yeah, man.

[00:51:03] Now I just, there's something about this.

[00:51:05] And I'm like, I think it's just like maybe, well, cause when I live in Costa Rica for four

[00:51:10] months, I was like, I could do this every day.

[00:51:12] Yeah.

[00:51:12] I'm not sad about this.

[00:51:14] 80 degrees with a slight breeze.

[00:51:16] But I mean, you got that weather plus you got the scenery, which is beautiful, right?

[00:51:21] Yeah.

[00:51:22] Costa Rica is the shit.

[00:51:24] But like when I'm going, America does not have great weather unless it's like Southern

[00:51:28] California pretty much.

[00:51:29] So I mean also maybe probably Miami or whatever.

[00:51:32] But like basically I think if I'm going to live in a place, it can't just be fuck.

[00:51:38] I need seasons in America.

[00:51:39] Like unless it's going to be perfect weather every fucking day like Costa Rica.

[00:51:43] I need like it to turn cold.

[00:51:45] Yeah.

[00:51:45] That was something that I always really liked about LA.

[00:51:48] But I think there is something to having the seasons.

[00:51:52] The season gives you some sort of character.

[00:51:54] And in LA, I mean, I met great people there.

[00:51:58] Don't get me wrong.

[00:51:59] But like the people there are very flaky and they're very business driven.

[00:52:03] So if you don't have anything to offer them business wise, they don't give a shit about

[00:52:08] No, they don't.

[00:52:09] So I always kind of and actors have this.

[00:52:14] A lot of people, they are actors.

[00:52:16] Oh, even the comedians.

[00:52:17] That's why I don't think it's I don't think that's why great comics come from LA that much.

[00:52:21] Yeah.

[00:52:21] No, there's not that many great comics from.

[00:52:23] I mean, I know a bunch and then they're really good.

[00:52:26] Yeah.

[00:52:26] But.

[00:52:28] But it's all I think it's in spite of the actual scene.

[00:52:31] I mean, I'm the best comics from New York to it's like that.

[00:52:34] It's hands down.

[00:52:35] I agree.

[00:52:35] Boston and New York to like my favorite comics like Bill Burr, Louie.

[00:52:40] They're all from Boston, man.

[00:52:42] Yeah.

[00:52:42] And like if you think about there's a lot of people that just from Boston like Patrice O'Neill

[00:52:48] was from Boston.

[00:52:49] Yeah.

[00:52:49] And things like dudes that they all moved to New York.

[00:52:51] Yeah.

[00:52:52] Yeah.

[00:52:52] I mean, then I don't like Dennis Leary at all.

[00:52:55] I think he steals jokes.

[00:52:56] Yeah.

[00:52:56] He did.

[00:52:56] He stole Bill Hicks his whole act.

[00:52:58] But basically he's from Boston.

[00:53:00] You know, it was like a Boston, a huge comedy boom, basically.

[00:53:04] Yeah.

[00:53:04] Back in the day.

[00:53:05] Yeah.

[00:53:05] But like everybody then moved to New York.

[00:53:07] Like it's like what I feel like Austin is now.

[00:53:11] It's like it's LA, but for Internet.

[00:53:15] Yeah.

[00:53:15] You know, it's not LA was for network television and movies and stuff like that.

[00:53:21] But Austin is LA for the Internet.

[00:53:24] Yeah.

[00:53:24] Which I never I always wanted to avoid those things.

[00:53:28] Yeah.

[00:53:29] But like you could do it yourself, man.

[00:53:32] That's what I'm saying.

[00:53:32] Like as all these places, you don't need network television anymore.

[00:53:36] If you just need to build stuff yourself, you can literally do it from anywhere.

[00:53:40] I see people.

[00:53:41] I see comics put out specials that live in like Cleveland, Ohio.

[00:53:44] Ohio, not good.

[00:53:45] Yeah.

[00:53:46] But at least they're putting it out.

[00:53:48] They're able to do it.

[00:53:49] Yeah.

[00:53:50] The thing is, if your special is that good, you're going to get traction.

[00:53:53] Yeah.

[00:53:53] You know, like the jokes that I'm putting out from my Colorado set.

[00:53:58] Can I give you a recommendation?

[00:54:00] Don't put two clips in one day.

[00:54:02] Do one a day and that gives you more of a traction sort of thing.

[00:54:05] I know.

[00:54:05] I fucked up.

[00:54:06] I also did two on a Friday.

[00:54:08] That was a bad move.

[00:54:10] Yeah.

[00:54:10] Just do one a day and then that way, because the algorithm now especially, it's more into

[00:54:17] like, oh, consistency.

[00:54:20] If you post consistently one a day.

[00:54:22] Yeah.

[00:54:22] That's what I figured.

[00:54:23] It'll start to give you more.

[00:54:24] That's what I fucking figured.

[00:54:25] I put two out and I was like, why not?

[00:54:27] And then, yeah, because only, yeah, because I noticed one of them does well and one of

[00:54:31] them doesn't.

[00:54:31] Yeah.

[00:54:32] So, I fucked up.

[00:54:33] That's all right.

[00:54:34] Look, you can take them down and then, I don't know.

[00:54:37] I don't know.

[00:54:38] I'm just going to leave them up.

[00:54:39] I just wanted them on my profile anyway.

[00:54:41] Yeah, yeah.

[00:54:41] Just to have, just for example.

[00:54:42] But I agree with you.

[00:54:45] And I also, I released two on Friday and I was like, oof, they're not going to do well

[00:54:49] because I did them at 11 a.m.

[00:54:51] Because Thursday, I found this website basically.

[00:54:54] It just tells you all the times to release.

[00:54:56] Opus clip?

[00:54:57] No, it wasn't Opus.

[00:54:59] But it was, that's what I used.

[00:55:00] To clip them?

[00:55:01] Yeah.

[00:55:02] But basically, I found like a website that was like, Mondays 11 a.m., Tuesdays 8 a.m.,

[00:55:10] Wednesdays 11 a.m., Thursdays 11 a.m., Friday 2 p.m., Saturday 8 a.m., Sunday 6 p.m.

[00:55:16] And I fucked, I forgot to look at it and I just put it out on 11 a.m. on Friday.

[00:55:20] Nothing.

[00:55:21] And I was like, what's going on?

[00:55:22] No.

[00:55:22] 2 p.m. rolls around and I started getting some stuff.

[00:55:24] Okay.

[00:55:24] But I was like, you know, I learned from that, whatever.

[00:55:28] Yeah.

[00:55:28] But it's the, dude, those algorithms are fickle anyway, so.

[00:55:32] Yeah.

[00:55:32] So that's, you know, I'm getting traction from the one joke I have.

[00:55:38] I'm getting like people keep watching it and people are sharing it and fucking liking it and stuff.

[00:55:44] Yeah.

[00:55:44] So it's like that's what you kind of have to fucking do.

[00:55:48] But you also kind of have to learn how the algorithm works.

[00:55:50] Yeah.

[00:55:51] Which.

[00:55:51] There's not like, and they don't put like an outline of like, hey, this is what you got to do.

[00:55:55] They just like change it and then you got to figure it out.

[00:55:57] I know.

[00:55:57] It sucks too because it's like when's the next time I'm going to be able to get a set that good and do that.

[00:56:02] It's like if I fuck up, who fucking knows when I'm going to be able to release those again.

[00:56:08] Yeah.

[00:56:08] I'm going to release some more shit.

[00:56:10] But so it's like, yeah, I mean, like people who are constantly doing shows like Jeff Dye or Adam Ray get clips and they can put their shit up literally the same one clip.

[00:56:21] Yeah.

[00:56:21] Every set they do, they can have a clip.

[00:56:23] That's.

[00:56:23] Yeah.

[00:56:24] That's ideally what I want to get to where I'm like, OK, I'm just doing shows constantly.

[00:56:29] That way it gives me the opportunity to like find some sort of clip here and there.

[00:56:32] Just post that because there's in every show you do.

[00:56:35] If you're doing well, there's always an opportunity for you to like, you know, post something.

[00:56:39] You know, that's what it's turned into now.

[00:56:41] And it's like, I don't like it.

[00:56:43] But no, I don't think really anybody likes it.

[00:56:45] But if you want to build your own.

[00:56:47] No, absolutely.

[00:56:48] Yeah.

[00:56:48] I mean, that's, you know, what's the sad thing is if you do record a special, you're literally just recording a special to make little clips.

[00:56:58] Yeah.

[00:56:58] And put it out.

[00:56:59] Yeah.

[00:56:59] And then you have it there for somebody if they want to watch the whole thing.

[00:57:02] Yeah.

[00:57:02] Yeah.

[00:57:02] At least the first one, I think.

[00:57:04] Right.

[00:57:05] Yeah.

[00:57:05] Well, I think all of them.

[00:57:07] Like, I mean, so my goal right now is to record a half hour.

[00:57:10] Right.

[00:57:11] Yeah.

[00:57:11] I need to practice a half hour.

[00:57:13] I did 25 minutes the other day.

[00:57:14] No sweat.

[00:57:15] It was a rough crowd.

[00:57:17] But it was still I did it.

[00:57:18] And I was I was like, oh, that was not hard.

[00:57:21] Yeah.

[00:57:21] But I need to keep practicing to the point where it's like literally it feels like doing five minutes for me now.

[00:57:27] Yeah.

[00:57:27] But a half an hour or whatever.

[00:57:28] Yeah.

[00:57:29] But like you can get tons of fucking clips from that shit, you know, and literally put everything up.

[00:57:36] And then.

[00:57:38] Yeah.

[00:57:38] I don't know.

[00:57:39] I'm still learning how to do it.

[00:57:40] Yeah, man.

[00:57:41] It's all a process.

[00:57:43] I the more we get to do things like that, just you'll figure shit out as you go.

[00:57:51] I know.

[00:57:51] It's the worst part about it because you didn't have to do this.

[00:57:54] It was literally like go to New York City or L.A.

[00:57:55] Funny.

[00:57:56] OK.

[00:57:56] Getting somebody notices to get an agent, get a thing and they'll figure everything out for you.

[00:58:00] Now.

[00:58:01] Now it's all about that.

[00:58:02] Yeah.

[00:58:03] So there's still ways to get around.

[00:58:05] That's why I think you don't need to be in these cities like New York or L.A. or Austin.

[00:58:12] You can actually be some if you're as long as you're getting booked, who the fuck cares?

[00:58:16] Because you can put out.

[00:58:17] Yeah.

[00:58:18] Yeah.

[00:58:18] And they don't care if you're in a brewery or a fucking like a restaurant as long as you're making the crowd laugh.

[00:58:25] Yeah.

[00:58:25] And as long as you got good jokes like my Dexter joke.

[00:58:29] I had two people comment that was like that was like, yo, that fucking was awesome.

[00:58:33] They really liked it.

[00:58:34] But that's the one getting the most traction.

[00:58:35] It's the Dexter joke.

[00:58:36] Yeah.

[00:58:36] I don't know why.

[00:58:38] It's just because who knows?

[00:58:40] I think people like dark shit too, man.

[00:58:42] So I don't know.

[00:58:43] Like, yeah, that's why I'm telling you, man, like, don't worry about it.

[00:58:45] Just just keep doing what you're doing.

[00:58:47] I don't even think that's that.

[00:58:48] That's the thing is I don't even think that it's that dark, I guess.

[00:58:51] I don't fucking know.

[00:58:52] It's just it's just pointing out.

[00:58:54] It's the subject matter, I think.

[00:58:55] Yeah, exactly.

[00:58:56] I just not that you're it's not that the actual content is dark.

[00:59:00] It's just the subject matter is something.

[00:59:02] I just think Dexter is a stupid concept.

[00:59:04] Yeah.

[00:59:04] It's just like it's the joke.

[00:59:06] Yeah.

[00:59:07] It's I just think it's a stupid concept.

[00:59:09] And I think a lot of people do, too.

[00:59:10] And then when you kind of explain it and make it funny, everyone goes, yo, that's true.

[00:59:15] The show is stupid.

[00:59:16] Plus, the show women like that.

[00:59:18] The show isn't that great either.

[00:59:19] Like it's sucked.

[00:59:20] It's just like he kills.

[00:59:22] He only kills the fucking bad people.

[00:59:23] And I watched the entire thing, though.

[00:59:25] Yeah, it was a dumb concept.

[00:59:26] I hated it when it was popular when it first came out.

[00:59:29] And I was like, this is stupid.

[00:59:30] Yeah.

[00:59:30] And everyone's like, no, it's a good show.

[00:59:31] I'm like, it's not.

[00:59:33] It's not that great.

[00:59:34] It's also serial killers aren't like that.

[00:59:37] It's just like I thought it was very silly.

[00:59:39] And it's just like my whole point is he's not a good dude.

[00:59:42] He's still a fucking serial killer.

[00:59:44] Yeah.

[00:59:45] He's just like they try to make it the serial killer with a heart of gold.

[00:59:47] That's the concept.

[00:59:48] That's the fucking whole concept of the show.

[00:59:50] Yeah.

[00:59:50] It's dumb.

[00:59:52] And he doesn't have a heart of gold because if you see like the guy, his dad from the

[00:59:58] get go, he's like, oh, this guy is fucking weird.

[01:00:00] I got to find a way to channel this.

[01:00:02] And then the guy just kept like, oh, I got to do this or whatever.

[01:00:06] And was he only kills the bad people.

[01:00:09] Yeah.

[01:00:09] I remember just a lot of because women love that show.

[01:00:12] And they were like, he only kills the bad people.

[01:00:15] Women love true crime.

[01:00:16] They love dumb shit.

[01:00:17] They love true crime.

[01:00:18] So it's like they're going to they're like and the guy's like like attractive.

[01:00:22] So it's like, oh, we got a hot guy that kills people.

[01:00:24] Oh, my God.

[01:00:25] I don't know, man, dude.

[01:00:27] So I don't know if you saw Jordan Peterson was talking about this.

[01:00:32] It was like Google figured out the top things that women Google.

[01:00:36] Yeah.

[01:00:36] Search for when for porn.

[01:00:40] They're not like pornography, but like, yeah, for porn.

[01:00:43] They rubbed one out too.

[01:00:46] And he was telling this and people were giggling.

[01:00:48] He's like, you're laughing, but this is true.

[01:00:50] It's like a surgeon, CEO, vampire, werewolf, pirate.

[01:00:58] Not even kidding, dude.

[01:01:00] I mean, why did Twilight and all that crap hit so hard?

[01:01:03] Because Jordan Peterson was like, look, if you look at it, it's just like a very powerful or dangerous person that you can try to tame.

[01:01:11] So that's what's attractive to them.

[01:01:13] That's what they are.

[01:01:14] Like, yeah.

[01:01:15] Why do you think they're attracted to bad like like bad boys so much?

[01:01:18] Yeah.

[01:01:19] Like because they want to see if they can like hold them down somehow.

[01:01:23] It's because literally like why do women like guys on motorcycles?

[01:01:26] Because they're attracted to the guy that's literally taking risk and it's dangerous.

[01:01:31] Right.

[01:01:31] But the whole time, once they fall in love with them, they're going to be bothering you not to fucking ride motorcycles anymore.

[01:01:37] And you're going to go fuck off.

[01:01:39] This is what I fucking love to do.

[01:01:40] Yeah.

[01:01:41] And if someone actually listens to them and they settle down, they're not attracted to them anymore.

[01:01:47] I know.

[01:01:47] So you got to kind of just keep doing everything, you know?

[01:01:50] I mean, if they're like, yo, can you please wear a helmet?

[01:01:54] I'd be like, yeah.

[01:01:55] Sure.

[01:01:55] It's fine.

[01:01:56] But I ain't stopping riding a goddamn motorcycle, you know?

[01:02:01] That's why you got to find the women that are like, that just kind of hold, they fight that shit.

[01:02:06] Awesome.

[01:02:07] Yeah.

[01:02:07] You got to be like, look, because they know they're silly and they know that they're kind of conflicting what their own feelings.

[01:02:14] You got to find the ones that are mature enough to be like, I'm not going to fucking do that shit anymore.

[01:02:19] Yeah.

[01:02:19] You know, it's just like, this is what he likes.

[01:02:21] This is what I'm attracted to.

[01:02:22] Of course, I want him to stop, but I'm going to be nagging him and it's annoying, you know?

[01:02:26] But like, there's no perfect.

[01:02:29] There's nothing.

[01:02:30] No, nothing's perfect.

[01:02:32] No, it's nothing perfect.

[01:02:33] But I get it, man.

[01:02:35] So, yeah, dude, I think your stuff is funny.

[01:02:38] I think people here will appreciate it.

[01:02:40] It's just a matter of, dude, sometimes I've found some of my jokes, they weren't doing well, but then I was also not in a good headspace when I was telling them.

[01:02:51] And then when I was in a good headspace, I didn't change any word or anything.

[01:02:55] I mean, probably the timing and stuff might have changed a little bit, but I was in a good headspace.

[01:03:00] And those jokes were doing great.

[01:03:02] No, that's fair.

[01:03:02] No, I agree.

[01:03:03] I mean, it definitely has something to do with your attitude as well.

[01:03:07] Yeah.

[01:03:07] But that's what I'm worried about.

[01:03:11] If I fucking hate it here and I'm literally just going to be like, yeah, I don't care.

[01:03:15] Like, I have a show later.

[01:03:16] It's at a fucking, you know what?

[01:03:18] I did it last week.

[01:03:19] Yeah.

[01:03:19] And the rules, you already told me the rules, which is like, you can't curse if there's kids there.

[01:03:25] Yeah, it's complicated.

[01:03:26] What the fuck?

[01:03:28] Dave Rouse is going first, which is hilarious.

[01:03:30] Oh, really?

[01:03:30] Yeah.

[01:03:31] Oh, wow.

[01:03:32] Also, you can't curse and also nothing making fun of children.

[01:03:36] And I'm just like, it goes half your act.

[01:03:39] Yeah.

[01:03:39] It's just like, I don't really want to do this, but I'm going to just have fun and try.

[01:03:43] Yeah.

[01:03:43] That's what you got to do.

[01:03:44] Just go.

[01:03:44] You can't really do material.

[01:03:46] You got to.

[01:03:47] Yeah.

[01:03:47] You got to go try to have fun, you know, make fun of some ladies with blue hair or whatever.

[01:03:51] But no, it's, it's just, I agree with everything you're saying.

[01:03:59] Like it's eventually someone will, will appreciate it.

[01:04:01] But like, I just know if I hate an area and I don't like it here, I'm not going to want

[01:04:07] to go out and do anything.

[01:04:09] Yeah.

[01:04:09] I get it.

[01:04:10] I mean, you're already not enjoying like the open mic scene, which is, is, is, is tough.

[01:04:15] Yeah.

[01:04:15] I mean, that's another, that's another thing too.

[01:04:17] That's why I'm not drastically moving.

[01:04:19] It's going to be another year.

[01:04:20] I've already decided.

[01:04:22] Cause I was like, my lease ends in February.

[01:04:23] It's too soon.

[01:04:24] I'm going to take it slow.

[01:04:26] I'm going to go out and visit very often to Colorado.

[01:04:30] See if my friends who I know can fucking fast track me.

[01:04:34] If I start doing it to the point where like, dude, we can get you all the time.

[01:04:38] Yeah.

[01:04:38] You can be regular here.

[01:04:39] Yeah.

[01:04:39] I'm going to get the fuck out of there.

[01:04:41] Yeah.

[01:04:41] I'm going to get the fuck out of here.

[01:04:42] Go to a place where I can constantly get in front of good crowds, bigger crowds.

[01:04:46] Denver scene is kind of woke though.

[01:04:47] I heard about that, but constantly in front of crowds.

[01:04:49] So I can get clips.

[01:04:50] There's also like, you can go to San Antonio, you can go to Houston, you can go Dallas.

[01:04:55] Yeah.

[01:04:55] So they have a bunch of comedy clubs and they're not that far, like three hours.

[01:05:00] Yeah.

[01:05:00] It's a, it's a good thing too.

[01:05:02] It's like, you know, I mean, I've also heard that Denver, it's a good scene.

[01:05:07] If you don't mind, I was talking to somebody, they were like, it's a good scene.

[01:05:11] If you don't mind driving the Denver from Colorado Springs.

[01:05:13] And I was like, you're already driving an hour anyway.

[01:05:15] It's not bad.

[01:05:16] It's only an hour.

[01:05:17] And I was like, yeah, she was, she was like, dude, you can make like $400 in a day doing

[01:05:21] standup.

[01:05:22] That's fine.

[01:05:22] That's amazing.

[01:05:23] That's great.

[01:05:24] And the pay, I mean, the, the, the only penalty is driving an hour.

[01:05:28] Yeah.

[01:05:28] And also my friend.

[01:05:30] And you're just living off a comedy.

[01:05:31] Yeah.

[01:05:32] My friend, uh, Mo got insanely better and funnier when she moved out there compared to New York

[01:05:39] because she was only getting five minutes in New York.

[01:05:41] And then when she went, went out to Colorado, she made a name for herself.

[01:05:45] She's, I saw her.

[01:05:46] She headlined, I believe.

[01:05:48] No, she was a feature.

[01:05:50] She was, she right before the headliner.

[01:05:52] Yeah.

[01:05:52] And it was amazing how I, I, she, she was like insanely, it's crazy better.

[01:05:59] Yeah.

[01:05:59] Crazy better.

[01:06:00] And I was just like, dude, that was awesome.

[01:06:02] Well, stage time is a thing, dude.

[01:06:05] Yeah.

[01:06:05] Stage time will make it.

[01:06:06] The more stage time you get, the more relaxed you are on stage because of the stage time you

[01:06:09] get.

[01:06:10] Yeah.

[01:06:10] But that's kind of what I'm searching for.

[01:06:13] And the thing is, Austin kind of feels like it's like going to be New York shit where

[01:06:17] it's just five minutes to 10 minutes shit and that's it.

[01:06:20] There's, there's some guys that will give you like 10 minutes.

[01:06:23] Yeah.

[01:06:23] So.

[01:06:24] Oh yeah, of course.

[01:06:25] But I, I, there's like, there were people, I remember when I was still in New York, people

[01:06:31] would be coming from like San Francisco for an example and they'd be, they didn't, they,

[01:06:37] yeah.

[01:06:37] And the thing about New York, they were only getting like five, 10 minute spots.

[01:06:41] The thing is in New York, you learn to be fast like that, right?

[01:06:43] Yeah.

[01:06:43] You gotta be punchline every seven seconds.

[01:06:45] Yeah.

[01:06:46] Shit like that.

[01:06:46] Yeah.

[01:06:46] So in San Francisco, they were learning to much longer sets and they, that's, you know,

[01:06:55] you kind of have to adjust.

[01:06:56] They would come to New York and everybody wouldn't be laughing and shit.

[01:06:58] Yeah.

[01:06:58] And it was more storytelling about, you know, like us in San Francisco.

[01:07:01] Yeah.

[01:07:02] LA and like, I think California over, I don't know about San Diego, but LA and San Francisco

[01:07:06] was more of that.

[01:07:08] Yeah, dude.

[01:07:08] I tried to tell a story on Saturday, last Saturday to a drunk crowd about my vasectomy

[01:07:15] in Costa Rica.

[01:07:16] Oh my God.

[01:07:16] It's a great story and it fucking kills every single time I tell people.

[01:07:20] But like, it was a dumb move in my opinion.

[01:07:23] I was like, do you want to hear the story?

[01:07:24] They were like, yeah.

[01:07:25] And I was just like butchering it because it was my first time and they were fucking

[01:07:29] bored.

[01:07:30] They were just like, it was, that's the thing, man.

[01:07:32] It's just like a certain, I mean, it's like certain scenes, you can really notice a difference,

[01:07:39] but it's like, can you tell a story?

[01:07:41] Okay.

[01:07:41] And it's like, no.

[01:07:43] It's got to be like, dick joke.

[01:07:45] Gay.

[01:07:45] That's gay.

[01:07:46] Gay.

[01:07:46] Retard.

[01:07:47] If it's a story that's got multiple punchlines like moving in there, you can get it to where

[01:07:52] it's, but what you, the cool thing is that you saw how it went, right?

[01:07:57] So now you kind of like.

[01:07:59] I have to look at the video.

[01:08:00] Just get the scaffolding for the story and then just put the punchlines in there, I guess.

[01:08:05] Yeah.

[01:08:05] I feel like this whole podcast is just about me wanting to leave.

[01:08:09] I mean, how long do you do this thing for?

[01:08:11] I typically do like an hour or so.

[01:08:13] Okay.

[01:08:14] We can keep, I don't have to be any, I don't have to leave.

[01:08:17] Sorry, you're going to edit this out, I guess, right?

[01:08:18] No, I'll leave it in there.

[01:08:20] Oh, okay.

[01:08:21] I don't have to leave.

[01:08:22] You see the views I get?

[01:08:23] Yeah.

[01:08:26] I should leave soon-ish, I think.

[01:08:29] Okay.

[01:08:29] Yeah.

[01:08:30] We can call it when you want it.

[01:08:31] Yeah.

[01:08:33] Was there anything else you want?

[01:08:34] No, that's probably it, right?

[01:08:35] Yeah, we could end it here.

[01:08:36] All right, cool.

[01:08:37] All right, thanks for coming on, man.

[01:08:38] I'll stay at least for another year, dude.

[01:08:41] Yeah, yeah, I'll stay for another year.

[01:08:42] All right.

[01:08:42] Caleb Barge, everybody.

[01:08:43] What's your social and all that stuff?

[01:08:45] Oh, at Caleb A. Barge on social media.

[01:08:49] Everything?

[01:08:50] Yeah, pretty much everything.

[01:08:51] All right.

[01:08:52] Go get them.

[01:08:53] Three people.

[01:08:54] Bye.

[01:08:54] Bye.